Mom, You're Not Helping: You know those movies where the elegant and erudite art thief uses all sorts of clever devices and scams to get past the supposedly impenetrable security to steal the painting and bring it back to his chalet to enjoy privately over a fine glass of Chateau LaTour? Well that's not what went on here. Apparently a certain French fellow (age 51, but still lives with his mother - hmmmm) has for the past 5 or 6 years been in the habit of stealing patinings from smaller art museums around Europe - primarily France and Switzerland. According to a radio interview I heard the other day, his modus operandi was to enter the museums with his girlfriend, have her stand look-out, cut the paintings out of their frames with an exacto knife, then walk out with the painting in his coat. He often picked up little pieces of silver and sculpture that would fit in his pockets also. Presumably, the security at these museums consisted of Pepe, the overfed, wine-besotted, retired constable, whom the police had trouble waking during their investigation. Quel Dommage!

Remarkably, he got caught for a smaller infraction and was only linked to all the robberies when his Mom panicked and destroyed all the paintings he had stolen over the years so there would be no evidence.

How can I presume to write comedy when stuff like this goes on?