[Rant] Sore Sorority

Another one bites the dust. I previously wrote of the problems at the Sigma Alpha Epsilon and Sigma Alpha Mu fraternities that I had minor interaction with during my college days, now The Kappa Alpha Theta sorority at Michigan has just gotten disbanded over allegations of hazing (so I guess something worse than pillow fights in nighties?) and under-aged drinking (I'm shocked, I tell you). This caught my eye because back when I was in a fraternity a few blocks down the street from them, they were considered the creme de la creme. They regularly pledged a high percentage cheerleaders and pom-pom girls and the favored daughters of Bloomfield Hills and Grosse Pointe. They were always thin and fresh and perfectly prepared. Envious girls seethed at them and frustrated boys sneered at them, but tunes would change were they to be favored with a pledge bid or a smile and a wink.

That was -- oh, let's see -- 30 years ago, so I have no idea whether their status on campus was still the same. Evidently they had been under scrutiny since 2011 -- double secret probation, I daresay -- and the impetus came from their national office so it was a matter of self-policing more than anything else, although the University forces were also involved. I can't help but be curious about what happened that would have degraded the poised debutantes of my youth into Kardashians gone wild. Of course, I don't really have to ask. Decades of increasing cultural crudity happened, just like it happened to everyone and everything else.

Still looking at a recent recruitment video, they appear little different from virtually every 20-something millennial girl I've ever met. They seem uniformly white, which in itself would probably incur the wrath of most institutions, yet insufficient ethnic vibrancy does not seem to be a formal charge. There is talk of hazing but no details, however an accusation of hazing from 16 years ago against KAT at the University of Cincinnati describes:

Kappa Alpha Theta members also shouted at new members while making them lie on the floor. In another instance, new members made animal noises until told to stop.

Am I creepy for wishing it had been something more juicy?

In the end, this looks pretty much like a win-win. I'm sure the ex-sisters of Kappa Alpha Theta will come out alright. After 30 years, they look to be the same sort of pretty, social, chippy, upper-middle-class, 20-year-old girls who have ruled popular culture since time immemorial. They'll share apartments and rented condos and have gatherings off campus where they are still the center of attention and where noble institutions won't make a fuss about their vodka and Red Bull. And the school-marms of academia will be able to pat themselves on the back and sleep easy with the righteous knowledge that they have made the world safer from the scourge of happy little girls of privilege.