Saturday, March 27, 2004

Slapping to the Oldies: Three reasons you Richard Simmons-haters need to turn a 180. Fast.
  • He is a goofy, rah-rah, semi-fruit nebbish, but he has a certain audience that responds to his particular form of encouragement. He has never forsaken them, which is both smart and decent.

  • Unlike many diet fad guru scam artists (*cough* Atkins *cough*) who claim it's what you eat, not how much, and uncountable infomercial shills for bizarre contraptions to give you rock-hard abs in five minutes a day, he doesn't sugar coat anything. Cut away the treacly sop and he makes it clear to all his followers that losing weight is a matter of willpower.

  • Most importantly, anyone who pisses him off, even an ultimate cage fighter, is subject to a right and proper public bitch slapping.

Something tells me that cage fighter is not going to strike fear into many opponents anymore.