I Drink, Therefore I Drink: Courtesy of The Legendary KK, we have Signs That You Drink Too Much (don’t know why she thought of me).

• That pink elephant followed you home again.


• You're as jober as a sudge.


• Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.


• Your job is interfering with your drinking.
  
• Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.


• The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in.


• You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.


• Your idea of cutting back is no salt on your margarita.


• At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."


• Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.


• The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.


• Hey, five beers has just as many calories as a burger, forget dinner!


• You fall off the floor.


• Ozzy Osbourne shakes his head when he walks past you.


• You can focus better with one eye closed.


• Two hands and just one mouth... - now that's a drinking problem!
  
• 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? - I think not!


• Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.


• You lose arguments with inanimate objects.


• Your career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts.